Off Topic Recopilatorio: Curiosidades, humor, ocurrencias, etc. Volumen XIV

Discussion in 'Foro General BMW' started by Manol, Nov 15, 2017.

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  1. user_1803.1206

    user_1803.1206 Usuario archivado

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    user_1803.1206, Jan 17, 2018
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  2. NaCl

    NaCl Forista Senior

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    -¡Pepe, Pepe, despierta!

    Y le dice el marido:

    -¡Qué! ¡Qué quieres!

    Y dice la mujer:

    -¡Que se te han olvidado las pastillas para dormir!
     
    NaCl, Jan 17, 2018
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  3. NaCl

    NaCl Forista Senior

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    NaCl, Jan 17, 2018
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  4. NaCl

    NaCl Forista Senior

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    NaCl, Jan 17, 2018
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  5. NaCl

    NaCl Forista Senior

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    NaCl, Jan 17, 2018
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  6. Hejachi

    Hejachi Forista

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    Hejachi, Jan 17, 2018
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  7. Hejachi

    Hejachi Forista

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    Hejachi, Jan 17, 2018
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  8. Coconut

    Coconut Clan Leader

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    Que tío?
     
    Coconut, Jan 17, 2018
    #2678
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  9. user_2307.0855

    user_2307.0855 Usuario archivado

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    jajjajjjajajja Dios ¡¡¡¡
     
    user_2307.0855, Jan 17, 2018
    #2679
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  10. user_2307.0855

    user_2307.0855 Usuario archivado

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    Que dolor ¡¡¡¡¡
     
    user_2307.0855, Jan 17, 2018
    #2680
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  11. roger bm

    roger bm Mitico Miembro del Club

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    roger bm, Jan 17, 2018
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    JOSITO MALA VIDA, NaCl, chezztos and 1 other person like this.
  12. leij

    leij Forista Legendario

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    Ya me tarda el viernes :lloro::lloro:
     
    leij, Jan 17, 2018
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  13. israel1975

    israel1975 Forista Senior

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    Me pide mi mujer un Roomba para reyes, le regalo esto porque vamos justos y se cabrea, cualquiera emtiende a las mujeres.



     
    israel1975, Jan 17, 2018
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  14. Gavira

    Gavira Tr3s españoles, cu4tro opiniones. Miembro del Club

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    (∀ꟽ) sn̗uɐꓭ oʇɹǝnԀ
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    - Me ha salido una Harley Davidson en un huevo Kinder.
    - Anda, fantasma.
    - Lo compré en Bilbao.
    - Ah, entonces puede ser.
     
    Gavira, Jan 17, 2018
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  15. bubucompact

    bubucompact En Practicas

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    Y él tan contento!!
     
    bubucompact, Jan 18, 2018
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  16. bubucompact

    bubucompact En Practicas

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    Y el conductor, que?? Se ve que lo usa, no? Pa que??
     
    bubucompact, Jan 18, 2018
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  17. user_1803.1206

    user_1803.1206 Usuario archivado

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  18. user_1803.1206

    user_1803.1206 Usuario archivado

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    user_1803.1206, Jan 18, 2018
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  19. user_1803.1206

    user_1803.1206 Usuario archivado

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    user_1803.1206, Jan 18, 2018
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  20. user_1803.1206

    user_1803.1206 Usuario archivado

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    - Doctor, cómo está mi marido?
    - Lo hemos perdido.
    - No diga tonterías, si le veo los pies por debajo de la sábana
     
    user_1803.1206, Jan 18, 2018
    #2690
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  21. aLbErTo8020

    aLbErTo8020 Clan Leader Miembro del Club

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    Que bragas ?
     
    aLbErTo8020, Jan 18, 2018
    #2691
  22. user_1803.1206

    user_1803.1206 Usuario archivado

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    user_1803.1206, Jan 18, 2018
    #2692
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  23. NaCl

    NaCl Forista Senior

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    NaCl, Jan 18, 2018
    #2693
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  24. Eduma

    Eduma Clan Leader Moderador Miembro del Club

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    c**o, son idénticos.

    [​IMG]
     
    Eduma, Jan 18, 2018
    #2694
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  25. NaCl

    NaCl Forista Senior

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    Un crío se levanta a las dos de la mañana a beber agua, y al pasar por la habitación de sus padres oye ruido y mira dentro.
    Los pilla haciendo un 69 y dice:
    - ¡No me lo puedo creer, y me quieren llevar a mí al psicólogo porque me chupo el dedo!
     
    NaCl, Jan 18, 2018
    #2695
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  26. NaCl

    NaCl Forista Senior

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    Se encuentran dos viudas en un cementerio, una muy feliz limpiando la lápida de su marido y cantando como loca.
    La otra, muy triste ...
    Al rato, la desconsolada mira a la contenta y le pregunta:

    - Ay, señora, ¿cuánto tiempo hace que enviudó?

    - Seis meses - respondió en tono alegre la otra.

    - ¿Y cómo hace para estar tan feliz si yo llevo 3 años y no he podido superar esta pena?

    - ¡Hija mía! porque después de muchos años, es la primera vez que se DONDE esta ,y QUIEN se lo esta COMIENDO!
     
    NaCl, Jan 18, 2018
    #2696
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  27. bubucompact

    bubucompact En Practicas

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    Se da un aire a Fito, que no??
     
    bubucompact, Jan 18, 2018
    #2697
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  28. NaCl

    NaCl Forista Senior

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    Un funcionario le pregunta a una señora:

    - ¿Cuantos hijos tiene, señora?

    - Diez..

    - ¿Como se llaman?

    - Bernardo, Bernardo, Bernardo, Bernardo, Bernardo, Bernardo, Bernardo, Bernardo, Bernardo, y Bernardo.

    - ¿Todos se llaman Bernardo? ¿Y como lo hace para llamarlos cuando, por ejemplo, están jugando todos afuera?

    - Muy simple, grito Bernardo y todos entran.

    - ¿Y si quiere que vayan a comer?

    - Igual. Grito Bernardo y todos se sientan a comer.

    - Pero si usted quiere hablar con uno en particular, ¿cómo lo hace?

    - ¡Ah! En ese caso, lo llamo por su apellido.
     
    NaCl, Jan 18, 2018
    #2698
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  29. roger bm

    roger bm Mitico Miembro del Club

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    roger bm, Jan 18, 2018
    #2699
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  30. roger bm

    roger bm Mitico Miembro del Club

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    roger bm, Jan 18, 2018
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